i may be someone's enemy

I think someone has made me their office enemy.

I'm getting some weird vibes from the executive assistant to our exec. dir. -- whom I rarely work with and don't know well at all.

So why should I be getting weird vibes?

A few examples:

1.She has a high pitched shrilly voice when she says hi to everyone. When she sees me, she waves and says nothing.

2. At the holiday white elephant gift exchange, she told my co-worker she stole my gift "just because." She didn't really want it, she just wanted to take it.

3. When she leaves the office, she walks by and says "Bye Gloria!" -- even though I share the office space with Gloria.

Am I just paranoid? Or do I have an office enemy... or rather, someone has chosen me as THEIR office enemy (because I don't have any office enemies)

And if I've been tagged as the woman's enemy, why?? I'm probably nicer at work than I am any other place in the world, not joking.

post-post remorse

"In Chino, a 25-year-old woman was swept to her death in a flash flood early Saturday...She was traveling east about 1 a.m. when her pickup truck was swept away by 8-foot-high waters."

Now I feel kind of bad.

week in review

unrelated to each other, but all relevant to me right now.

1. "Hope is that thing inside us that insists, despite all evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us if we have the courage to reach for it, and to work for it, and to fight for it." -- Damn you, 0bama. Your politics aren't as progressive as white-boy Edwards, but man, your speeches always get me. I'm so glad you stomped on h1llary in Iowa. I can't wait for November.

2. Season 5 of the-show-that-rocks-my-face-off starts on Sunday. "The show would instead be about untethered capitalism run amok, about how power and money actually route themselves in a postmodern American city, and, ultimately, about why we as an urban people are no longer able to solve our problems or heal our wounds...a show that would, with each season, slice off another piece of the American city, so that by the end of the run, a simulated Baltimore would stand in for urban America, and the fundamental problems of urbanity would be fully addressed."

"I’m from Baltimore and I’ve got some s*** you f***** need to see, people! Put down that CSI s*** and pay some heed, motherf******!"

"My standard for verisimilitude is simple and I came to it when I started to write prose narrative: f*** the average reader...The average reader, as they meant it, was some suburban white [cable] subscriber with two-point-whatever kids and three-point-whatever cars and a dog and a cat and lawn furniture. He knows nothing and he needs everything explained to him right away, so that exposition becomes this incredible, story-killing burden."

"Most smart people cannot watch most TV, because it has generally been a condescending medium, explaining everything immediately, offering no ambiguities, and using dialogue that simplifies and mitigates against the idiosyncratic ways in which people in different worlds actually communicate. It eventually requires that characters from different places talk the same way as the viewer. This, of course, sucks."

-- Why the W1re rocks my face off. Quotes from Creater-Writer David Simon in an awesome interview with Nick Hornby.

3. "DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF FLOOD WATERS. ONLY A FEW INCHES OF RAPIDLY FLOWING WATER CAN QUICKLY CARRY AWAY YOUR VEHICLE." -- The warning from the national weather service website... the image it conjures in my mind makes me laugh, I don't know why. I wonder if any of the drunk Hollywood "It" girls will be driving out tonight. If only...

obligatory new year's post.

It's 2008. It's going to be a long year.
There, I did it.

you can see the joy on his face

Guess what movie inaugurated our new 42-inch LCD tv:

His choice, not mine.


Good bye panason1c 19-inch. You served me well. Through the various bay area moves, getting drenched with water after my ceiling collapsed, you remained faithful. Thanks for the memories.

today's union commentary...

"NO JUSTICE, NO NOODLES!"
- NYC Chinese restaurant workers who are protesting the blacklisting effort against workers who are trying to organize.

vs.

"Don't be ugly, don't be petty, You won't get your Ug1y Betty!"
- WGA members

I'm not sure which is more compelling.

speaking of corporation greed...

Tonight, Hannah represents her 'hood against the evil developers near her neighborhood who want to build a parking lot facing their house.

I'm so proud of you, Hannah... not only for speaking up but also for spending almost 4 hours sitting in a planning commission meeting. Yay for streaming online commission meetings!



... and a guest appearance by AhBuhNim

Minsoo & I had stopped paying attention by this point, until we heard him say "My daughter hannah y..." and we were like OH SNAP, DAD TOO! REPRESENT YU!

damn you merid1th grey

fine. no more tvontheinternets.

stupid corporate greed.

[see youtube video put out by the wga titled ourfriendsfromgrey.]

tvontheinternet rocks (corporate green sucks)

I've been challenged by someone on my tvontheinternets habit despite my so-called support of the writers' strike. My response: I continue to watch tv online as a way to be counted as part of the online viewership so the writers can continue to make a case of why they need to get paid... and of course, I haven't gotten a memo saying to ban tvonline. But rest assured when I do, I will stand in solidarity, I promise.

quarantined

I'm at home, quarantined by my boss who refused to let me come into work. I've watched all of the past episodes of survivor (by the way, eating 1000 yr old eggs is not the most foulest thing in the world, JeffProbst -- people here in the US eat that stuff, go out and get yourself some culture), did as much laundry as my quarters would take me & checked my email 20 times.

I'm so bored.

Here's a tidbit about the neighborhood where I work. I've been reluctant to post anything about it because it's not like this everyday:

2:30 pm Monday. The corner of West Slauson and South Western. Over 200 people watch as a brawl between 30 women ends as one drives her convertible into the melee. Two women were injured. One, Shontae Blanche, a 22 year old pregnant woman, is killed.

One witness, who asked not to be identified, said the driver hit the pregnant woman with her car, dragged her nearly 10 feet until she fell off, then backed up and ran over her again.

That's the corner where I go to get my starbucks fix. Usually, I go in the afternoon, but I had a meeting on Monday. Guess it's good I didn't go.

give 'em their money!

I'm a believer in the power of unions to help maintain the middle class and protect workers rights. I know there are "bad" unions out there that make it hard for businesses, but I know A LOT of unions that have made sure teachers get paid, service employees get their due and port workers can keep their heads above water (see thebestshowintheworldthewire).

I know hollywood is a souless place, but the writers strike is legit. The Office writers have a great youtubevideo (go to youtube dot com and search for theofficeisclosed, with spaces).

Industry, give 'em their money! Reality TV sucks.

anti-social internet user

I joined one of those new fangled online networking sites recently. I don't know why, given that I'm very paranoid about having my stuff out there. I did it just because it seemed like a safer place than my-whatchamacalit and it seemed legit.

By joining this networking site, I was hoping to stay under the radar and just monitor the landscape. Silly me. The madness is already beginning... And by madness, I mean the "unwanted adding"... I mean the friend requests from people who I've been trying to avoid for a decade (at least).

Dang it. I don't want to add them. But I can't NOT add them. They'd know, right?

And once one of them adds me, then everyone else sees me on their list and then wants to add me. And then I got a whole bunch of unwanted adding. Soon, my "list" will consist of more non-friends because I'm only adding people who find me and most of my friends know I'm adverse to these sites. [I typically only add friends who request to be on my list first.]

What do I do? What do I do? I wish I wasn't so anti-social on the web. I'm seriously considering erasing my profile. I'm think I'm going to go erase my photo from my profile right now.

i live right there.

View Larger Map

the motherland

I returned home last weekend from China and barely made it through work this week. Here are a few pics from the trip:

Nanjing Road in Shanghai


Terracotta warriors from the Qin Dynasty were unearthed in the 70s in Xi'an, the former capital of China way back when.


We took two highly unsafe golf-cart things in Yangshuo. Breathtaking scenery. This photo doesn't do it justice.


On our way up to Victoria Peak in Hong Kong, Minsoo, found Bruce...


We also saw my mom's cousins... including TRIPLETS. One of them has 11 fingers. All three of them are very strange looking.

heading to the motherland...

Please pray for traveling mercies and no diarrhea. [Particular emphasis on the latter.]

weekend in review

This past weekend was my aunt's memorial service, which was sad and traumatic 1. because we weren't sure whether she was a Christian and 2. because it concluded with watching her casket be placed into a big metal contraption with red buttons. Yes, a cremation machine.

I now know how I do NOT want my funeral to be like.

On a lighter note, I was able to see family & friends so the whole weekend wasn't totally emotionally draining. It was, however, very physically draining as it was so freakin' hot. We went bowling for Secret's 21st b-day and the bowling alley's a/c was broken. Sweaty drinking bowling fun.

Next up? Minsoo and I are preparing for my family trip to the motherland. Shanghai, Xi'an, Guilin, Shunde & Hong Kong. Woo wee.

Auntie Wai

My aunt was diagnosed with MDS last year, which developed into AcuteMyelogeneousLeukemia. While they were deciding whether or not to do chemo, they found a huge tumor in her back. She went through 10 days of radiation but then developed a fever. They gave her tylenol, but it turns out she had pneumonia.

My aunt passed away this afternoon. I'm not sure about her God status, although a lot of my family members were talking to her about JC. This is what saddens me the most.

This is how I will remember my very kind aunt:

my flower girl...

... on her first roller coaster ride.

Thanks Cy, thank you so much.

Pics From Atlanta

My posse
Myself, another staff and two members at the opening day march. A random looking group huh?


Lots of people... really hot...
The first day of the forum we marched through downtown Atlanta. Hannah was there representin' the ac1u and making sure my civil rights remained intact and we didn't get beat up by the police or cause a riot...


Civil liberties? Check.
If you look closely, you can see that the police officer is not only lounging on the back of his car, but also smoking a cigar. I think LAPD needs to learn from their fellow cops in the ATL.



See? Asians care about social justice too.
This group were Koreans against war and neoliberalism. They brought their drums EVERYWHERE. They'd just stop in the middle of some random plaza and start playing their drums. I'd see them around the hotels where the workshops were being held and in the subway and they were always wearing their hats and carrying those drums. In 90 degree humid weather, that's dedication.


Ebenezer Baptist Church
It was crazy sitting in the sanctuary, imagining what it would have been like to hear MLK jr speak at this church.


Hannah's Atlanta Food tour...
And of course, getting to hang out with Hannah all week was pretty yummy, I mean fun.


Next: Pics from NYC

(hot)Lanta

I just got back from Atlanta where I was at the US_Social_Forum, a gathering for activists from around the country (and some from around the world) talkin' about making US a better place and how our neo-liberal policies, imperialist, war-monging, globalizing ways need to stop. I know, fun stuff.

A few (non-political) highlights (though I will post about the political highlights because that's how I roll):

- Eating tator tots with cheese fondue. I know, tator tots... dipped in cheese! I felt like a fancy 9-year old.

- Seeing Ebenezer Baptist church -- in color! I'd only seen it in black and white photos. It was so awesome to visit the birthplace of the civil rights movement and be able to connect faith with social justice.

- Spending time with hannah who kept me entertained and well fed throughout the trip. Had it not been for her, I would have been hungry for most of the trip.

- All you can eat shredded bbq pork sandwiches with $5 pitchers of beer. Orange shakes, brunch and fried chicken(not all together). Yeah!

A few low-lights:
- Being hit on while getting on the bus by Andre 3000-wannabe. He was so ridiculous, it was hard to be offended. Lens-less white rimmed glasses, suspenders, plaid pants and a dress shirt... in 90 degree weather I can't even describe it but to say that it was purely ri-diculous. Aw-right, Aw-right, Aw-right...

- Missing out on the API mixer because after going to 2 hotels, I couldn't find the meeting place and then being rained on. Turns out, they had the mixer at a hotel next to the one they said it would be at, in the basement, with the door closed. Stupid APIs. I guess we are exclusive and cliquey.

- Humidity and heat. I thought one of my co-workers (who's over 50) was going to keel over and have a heart attack. I'm not kidding. At one of the subway stations, there's this long escalator going down into the station. It felt like a descent into hell.

- People who don't wear deodorant. A lot of the "hippies" at our forum went eau natural and did not believe that getting cancer from deodorant is a far better way to go than passing out from smelling each other.

- Being asian in the Atl. It's like having a sign that says "HEY, LOOK AT ME. I'M YELLOW. PLEASE STARE AT ME AND ASK ME WHERE I'M FROM BECAUSE I SURE AM NOT FROM HERE." I'm sure there are a lot of us in the outerlying areas, but I did not see any in the inner city.

Anyway, lots more to come. Glad to be back home.

this i believe...*

1. RoyPearson is a crazy litigious tool who should be disbarred. (In case you've been living in a hole, this is the mofo that sued a dry cleaners $54M for losing a pair of his pants. Read the news suckas!)

2. The new BBC show "The Planners" is the most awesomeness idea I have ever heard of. I'm sure only me and my urban planning friends think this show is going to rock, but you wait and see. You wait and see.

3. Many of my male and female single friends live on the wrong coast (or not close enough to a coast). Below is a diagram showing ratio of single males to single females in the US. I won't call you out but you know who you are.



*For those of you NPR lovers

good news

Whew. What a month.

I've been MIA because I haven't felt like writing lately. Plus I felt like anything I'd write after the last post would seem superficial or not thoughtful enough.

Anyway....

Good news is blog-worthy, so....
Minsoo and I....
(I know what you're thinking and it's not that!)
...got promotions. Praise God! I've never wanted to be rolling in the bucks, but knowing that we are becoming a bit more financially settled is a blessing. Gah, I guess this means we're adults.

Family drama sucks anus.

I'm going up north this holiday weekend for a mid-week funeral and then driving down the same day after the funeral for the burial in LA.

So Sad.

On top of all of that, some of my extended family members are causing trouble and making this time even hard for all of us. They made it hard for us while my grandmother was dying and now are making life miserable for all of us as we struggle to deal with the sadness and stress of losing a loved one. Even my 71-year-old Dad is feeling the stress -- last night, almost got arrested at the airport for arguing with a cop when he was trying to pick up my cousin. I know, crazy and weird.

If you guys can pray for me I'd appreciate it... because all I want to do right now is go up north and kick the crap out of one of my (not blood related) aunts and cousins.... and what I really should be doing is going up and spending quality time celebrating my grandmother with my relatives.

When this is all done, I think I need a spa day.

Wen Yei Fung Lee

My grandmother passed away on Tuesday afternoon. She was 99 and a tough, tough lady. I will always remember her strength and faith... and her love of strong drinks and peanut butter. Thanks for everything, Ma-Ma. I hope you have fun in heaven. *sniff sniff*

a case of the mondays.

This weekend I went to see my grandmother + all of my extended family in the 'Jo. It was a doozy and I'm still recovering. I'll post about it later.

One clue about how I'm feeling after this weekend: It's 12:13pm and I'm at work but I could really use a drink about now.

My grandmother is tougher than your grandmother

These past few weeks I've been sort of in a holding pattern. My grandmother is close to death and my family and I have been preparing for it. We were told that it might be this week so we've been preparing the slide show, eulogy, the funeral services, etc. and travel arrangements for us to go up north for the ceremony at the end of this week. However, my Ma-ma is as tough as nails and has continued to surprise us. The doctors and nurses did not expect her to last this long. It's Tuesday and her vitals are still strong, despite being off her IV and not eating. It's hard because she's up north and I can't see her everyday, all I can do is wait.
My grandmother turned 99 on Friday!

happy birthday!

Minsoo and Oojin!

one more day

I've been feeling really worn out -- from my grandmother to my sick stomach to work. So I just sat down to write an entry all about my woes.

But just when I feel like complaining about the things in my life, God reminds me that hey, I don't have it so bad. I flipped on the news and saw the brush fires burning on the east side of LA. And it humbled me.

War, poverty, corruption, injustice. That crap is serious. Not that my stuff isn't sad, stressful and important to me, it's just that there's more to life. On days that I put it all into perspective, I can put off complaining until another day. And that's one more day I can spend being grateful for what I have. Because this cranky girl needs all the days she can get.

it's been a fun 3 days

Monday morning I was rudely awakened at 6:30am by nausea, followed by the big D, followed by throw up. lots of it.

And... repeat. And... repeat.

Almost 9 hours later, my body finished its hourly purge. I laid down to try and sleep but couldn't because of pain in my abdomen. I called Dr. Nakji to ask him where the nearest ER was and he came by and went with me and minsoo to the ER.

Four hours and 2 bags of fluids, 1 blood/urine test, 1 anti-nausea med later, I left the ER feeling a tad bit better. I guess. Or maybe it was the cute intern taking my blood that clouded my judgment, I dunno.

When I woke up on Tuesday I felt better, but as the day progressed, my stomach kept hurting. I'm assuming it's from all of the trauma of Monday, but it made it impossible to eat or sleep or even move comfortably, so I still sort of felt like crap.

Today I woke up and felt better and was able to move around without pain and even do some work from home. Next step: a meal with solid food.

I hate food poisoning. Although had it not been for this, I would have been at the Tuesday marches and might have been at all of the craziness that ensued with the police. I'm not sure which one would have been better.

ma ma

My grandmother is 98 years old. I know, NINETY EIGHT! She's lived a full life.

Anyway, she had a stroke this weekend.

I'll be up in SJ on Wednesday for a day just to see her. I heard she's pretty much in a coma. We've gone through a few scares and she's always managed to pull through. This time, it's not looking good.

One of my favorite memories of her is when she taught us how to make ghetto char siu baos using pre-made bisquits in that pop-up canister. So wrong, yet so yum.

i OD'd on tragic news

Part of my job is to track latest news on all things related to my work (especially when I'm procrastinating). This means that part of the day, I'm on the "internets" tracking news outlets -- and this means that todayI OD'd on news coverage of the V1rginia Tech sh00tings. I couldn't stop refreshing on my RSS feeds, reading the student blogs, watching the horrible grainy cell phone clips. So tragic. Anyway, don't really know what else to say, given that I'm so removed from that situation yet feel strangely connected. Those buildings reminded me of my own college experience which made me remember how safe and insulated I felt wandering campus.

So anyway, now I'm watching danc1ng with the stars to try and neutral1ze it all.

Sad sad day. [Insert cliche statement about life here.]

carz in the hood.

Today i saw

- A yellow car on hydrolics.

- A car parked in the middle of the jack-in-the-b0x parking lot (not in a space), radio blasting, no driver in sight.

- A car start to pull out of the gas station -- with the pump still in the car's nozzle. The dude driving the car screeched to a halt and screamed, "NOT AGAIN??!!"

Just another day workin' in the hood.

thank you m1ss manners

... for agreeing with me on this one. I've always found it offensive when strangers stop me and tell me to smile and only when I'm alone. Every time I've shared this people makes me feel like I'm crazy for thinking this. They make excuses or make me feel as if I'm being rude. Now, I can stick out my tongue and tell people, "M1ss Manners told I don't have to smile at you!!"

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm a bit unsure how to respond to strange men who greet me on the street. (I work in an area where this is common.)

I feel rude ignoring a friendly greeting, yet I can't help but notice that this does not happen when I am in the company of others, nor do these apparently very outgoing folks seem to greet single men. Usually I smile weakly and hurry by. Do you have any better advice?

GENTLE READER: Yes: Don't smile weakly.

This society is in dire need of a clear understanding of the word "friendly." Miss Manners notices that nowadays it is mostly used to describe meager service at impersonal institutions or unwelcome liberties administered by strangers.

"I was only trying to be friendly" is the argument by which the intrusive make their hapless targets feel that they are the ones who have transgressed. It is not only predators who ogle lone females but also grabbers who administer hugs on anyone they have diagnosed as being in emotional need; busybodies who probe for personal information, critics who offer unsolicited assessments and advice; and all those who address adults they have never met before (or, as in the case of telephone solicitors, whom they never will meet) by their first names or nicknames.

Are these people actually friends? Are they promising candidates for friendship?

No, but the fear that failing to respond would be rude works, as it did on you, because we Americans pride ourselves on being a friendly people. In a mobile society, as in the frontier circumstances that preceded it, it is pleasant and necessary to be open to new friendships.

However, this does not mean that we have surrendered the privilege of choosing our friends. If your greeters were simply full of harmless good cheer, why would they ignore you when you happen to be accompanied by, say a big burly gentleman? Unless you consider that rude, you should realize that you may also ignore them without being rude.

While we're on this topic, during work functions I've had two men ask me if I work out. What is that about? Ew.

an LA day

There are some days when I think that living in LA is awesome. Today was one of those.

I went to the anti-war march/rally with messy in Hollywood today. One of the speakers was President Bartlett, uh, I mean Mart1n Sheen. He gave a really inspiration talk, messy said MS was probably channeling the WestWing. There are a lot of crazies in the anti-war/peace movement. We chose to walk by the "Immaculate community" -- a bunch of senior citizens holding signs that spoke messages of peace and hope. We liked it better than standing with the flag-covered coffins.

The march started at Ho11ywood/Vine. We were standing in front of the PantagesTheater debating whether or not we should go back to the theater and get cheap W1cked tickets for the evening show. The march was very Hollywood -- where else can you march against the war AND get tickets for a show? Okay, maybe NYC. But can you see a Jedi, Spongebob Square Pants AND batman along the march route in NYC? I think not. Hollywood is an awesomely weird place. Last time I went with Minsoo, Sarah, Secret and Secret's sister, we saw a dude bleeding by the metro station. Awesome.

Today, we took the metro -- yes, LA has a (limited) subway system. It was very convenient. It's super clean (because no one really takes it) and the trains feel new. It's like BART, only nicer. When I ride the metro I can see and appreciate the hard work of my urban planning bretheren (as a lot of metro employees were ucla_urban planning grads). Nerdy.

On another LA note, I rented Quinceanera today, which is about life in Echo Park, through the eyes of a Latino family. Echo Park is near Chinatown in LA -- a working class predominantly Latino community that is being transformed into a "hip" area. There were a lot of gentrification undertones and a lot of cool scenes of LA in the movie -- two of my favorite topics. My coworker was even an extra in one of the scenes! Yay for LA.

people never get it right.

Yesterday I was walking down the street in the 'hood with a co-worker, on our way to a workshop we were facilitating, when an African American man (possibly homeless) walked by us and exclaimed, "Wow an Asian and a negro, together! Wow! Korea and Africa."

We just shook our heads and I said, "People never get it right." My co-worker said "Oh my gosh... some people...all you can do is laugh." I know he had good intentions and was probably genuinely impressed with us, but he just expressed it in a weird way.

The other day, my boss told me that one our leaders (I work for a community organizing group led by community residents who are members/leaders) asked her how old I was. When my boss told the leader, he said, "What? I thought she was 12!"

People have weird observations and assumptions of me. I think it's also because I don't work in a community of people that look like me. I don't think I've ever work with people that look like me. Eventually I hope to. It's hard because I definitely feel marginalized by the assumptions people have of me based on my assumed race/ethnicity, age, gender. People who say those things don't matter in life must live in a hole. I notice my identity everyday.

flying solo

Minsoo's in the motherland this week and I already miss him.

On Friday night, when I returned from dinner with hannah and messy, I walked by my neighbor's apartment and saw my neighbor sitting at his dining room table in front of the window... cleaning his rifle.

I didn't sleep well on Friday night. 7 more days to go.

honolulu here i come

I'm off to Hawaii tomorrow afternoon for my cousin's wedding... Yes, my other cousin who lives there is getting married there this weekend. It's nice to have relatives over there. Minsoo is going to freezing cold-ass Boston this weekend. So sad!

I don't think it's going to be a very restful vacation, but at least I'll be somewhere warm and I dig the local island food. I also like flying Hawa11an air. I immediately feel the "Aloha" when I step onto the plane. I guess that cheesy ukelele music, island patterned seat covers and flight attendants really get me in the island mood.

Gahhhh It's too bad I'll be doing work on the plane! Aloha.

for my sisters (in law)

"Because I like it!!"
Holla.

my parents and their scary pop culture knowledge

In the car, on the way home from dinner, I was talking about the movie Id1ocracy:

me: Speaking of ...BritneyS is one of those idiots who's procreating like crazy. I mean she cuts off all her hair and --

mom: And you know what she did after that? She went and got some tattoos!

dad: No, she got the tattoos BEFORE she cut her hair --

me: -- Alright, let's stop talking about this. (to minsoo) I can't believe my parents are talking about Britney_Spears.

a social justice love message

"Choosing love we also choose to live in community, and that means we do not have to change by ourselves... the moment we choose to love we begin to move against domination, against oppression. The moment we choose to love we begin to move toward freedom..." -- bell hooks

RIP favorite pajama pants

I have a favorite pair of blue pajama pants that I bought on a whim at AmericanEagle in '03. They've become my favorite because the length fits me perfectly.

As many girls might tell you, finding a good pair of comfy pj pants is like gold. In college, I used to wear pjs to class when I was feeling sick, lazy or fat. I used to go home and put on my pj pants immediately after eating at the dining hall because my jeans were too restricting. I know that many of the girls Anyway, we girls love them pajama pants.

This is why I was distraught when I put on my pj pants tonight and found a BIG ASS fat hole in my favorite pj pants... not only was it gigantic (I could fit my fist through it), but the hole was smack in the middle of my left butt cheek, providing an ample view of my underwear. The hole wasn't even really a "hole," but more of a spot in the pants that had worn down to the threads and then eventually expanded into a huge hole. Basically, my pjs were disintegrating, starting with the material covering my ass. Well, that's not totally true. I guess I didn't heed the warning signs: the holes on the waistband that revealed the elastic band and drawstring and the small holes on the semas on the side of the pant legs...

Minsoo thought it was really hilarious and made fun of me but I'm so sad. Do you know how hard it is to find pj pants for short girls? I might have to hit up the children's section.

has hell finally frozen over?

No really, has it?

Rush hour on "the devil" (aka the 4o5 freeway) is usually from 2pm-9pm so when I hop on the freeway at 6:30pm I fully expect to inch along for a hellish 3 miles or 4 exits. Today, I hopped on the "devil" after work today and zoomed along... at 60 miles per hour on the far right lane... for the entire time! It took me 3 minutes to drive what normally takes me at least 20 minutes.

Wheeeeee!! I was giddy when I drove off the freeway and didn't even have to stop at the signal at the bottom of the ramp. It was a total rush.

I had to come home and immediately capture this moment. I have a feeling this was a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

good, bad, ugly

The good: The book, The Namesake_by JhumpaLahiri. Minsoo and I got the book from hannah & sarah and I started it the week after Christmas and finished it up this past weekend. I usually like non-fiction books about politics & religion, but occassionally I get hooked on a really good novel or piece of children's lit (i.e. HarryP0tter). I can't wait for the movie.

The bad: Minsoo is sick... again! He had bronchitis, got better, went to Sundance and now is sick again! I've been sleeping on the futon for the past month to try and avoid the germies. I think Phil is getting annoyed at my attempts to help him get better. I can't help it -- I am obsessed with problem solving, which he calls "telling me what to do." I say it's "being a good wife."

The ugly: I had an "ug1y betty" moment this past week: While most of the time I muddle around, trying to figure out how to fit into my job and my workplace, I had a great meeting with the pres. of my organization -- the first time I'd ever met with him personally since I started interning/working TWO years ago. We talked about my background (i.e. frustrated journalism career, crazy weird non-profit work, urban planning school) and my aspirations (Asian American progressive organizing/capacity building/electoral power/research) and after the convo, I totally felt reinspired by my work. When I got into my car after the meeting, I turned on the radio to hear that KT Tunsta11 song "Suddenly 1 See" -- the same song that played after the first ep. of U.B. when she walks away feeling good about her work after having the worst first week ever. Anyway, when I heard it, I thanked God for reminding me that things will get better and that Betty Suarez is one of my new heroes. Shut up, it's cheesy but true.

state of the uni0n

The annual address by the prez is always a fun political time. Today I got the chance to get home from work early so I got to watch the political show. Dang it, this is when I wish I got cable so I could watch Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.

Some "Fun" stats I collected while watching:
- Number of times W used any words related to terr0rism: 19
- other fav words of W: security (9) & enemy (9)
... If we were playing a drinking game, I'd be wasted by now.

Significant moments:
- Addressing the speaker of the house as "Madame." Hells yeah, Nancy,you my girl! The first female speaker of the house and 3rd in line to be president. Historic. Work that pale green suit, girlfriend! I'm a little bit teary eyed at this point... but don't worry, the tears don't last for long...
- The Iowa senator started clapping like crazy when W mentioned ethanol (his state makes a lot of corn!) -- It looked like he was playing deal or no deal and just picked briefcase number 10 in hopes that it's filled with a dollar.
- The president briefly mentions diplomacy as part of his "plan" for Iraq... does he even know what that means? Beer almost spilled out of my nose.
- The camera was focused on Condi, who was staring really intently and looked drugged out. She has weird eyes.
- W mentions Sept 11th and connects the war in Iraq. Haven't we gone over this before?
- 92,000 soldiers deployed in the next 5 years :(
- The subway hero is honored in the gallery!! I wonder if it's the greatest moment of his life, but I guess saving a guy who's fallen onto subway tracks by jumping onto of them to hold them down while a train rolls over you is pretty friggin amazing and crazy scary. Being in the gallery during the state of the uni0n address is just kinda exciting.
- Some lady gets a huge old smooch from W as he's walking out of the gallery and signing autographs. She looks all giddy. Ewwwwww.

There you go, now you know some of the most insignificant details from W's speech.

Obama in 2008. Obama in 2008. Obama in 2008.

an open letter to my neighbors at apt #15

Dear Sirs,
I respect the fact that everyone has different living habits, however, I'd like to address the way you like to wake up in the morning. Yes, I'm writing about the obscenely loud stereo system blasting bad -um I mean "rock metal hybrid"- music. Based on my observations, I can only assume that you may have the following ailments:
- loss of hearing (I can hear and feel the thump of each and every word of every song you play on your stereo at 6am -- is the thumping what wakes you up?)
- lack of taste (waking up to nickelback makes me want to rip my ears off in the morning)
- inability to hit snooze (i know that you must love that one song, but it's just mean to make us listen for longer than 5 minutes)
- lack of taste (come on now, blasting NICKELBACK???? At least pick a decent artist... some hip hop perhaps?)
- a sleep disorder (This is why you cannot set your alarm to a normal volume)

Everyday I consider banging the wall with my fist and shouting, "Shut the HELL up you freak with no taste!!" but I'm so exhausted from waking up at 6am to the sound of snow patrol's chasing cars (the cool song you've played, but is now tainted as I cannot listen to it without feeling cheated) I cannot drag my body out of bed to bang on the wall 1 foot from my bed. Sometime I sing along to this song while waving my fist and crying bitter tears, mourning the death of my slumber.

I've considered walking next door and telling you to shut up, but I think you already know. I think you already know because when I see you in the hallway, you don't look me in the eye. I think you know you already messed it up when your apartment smelled like ass for a month and the stench made me gag as I walked by your open window each day. And I'm not even going to go into your recent re-tiling effort and the way your creepy friends glare at me through the windows when you're playing poker and I walk by.

I'd like to ask for your consideration, however, I highly doubt you will change your ways. So I guess this letter is just a way for me to let you know that just in case you hear a thumping and shouting coming from the southern wall of your apartment, It's me, crying out for one more hour of sweet, sweet sleep.

Your neighbor,
Me.

crack tax?

Today I was in the car, talking to minsoo, when I caught the end of an NPR story about the "crack tax."

I was like...the what??

I didn't catch the whole story so I wasn't sure what they were talking about but I was hoping that it was a tariff on girls who wear such low riding pants that you can stick a nickel in their ass-cracks. Even better would have been to add a tax for the "muffin-top" offense. You know what I'm talking about.

It turns out, though, that the tax is on drug dealers in Tennessee. They pay it annonymously and if they are caught dealing drugs they must prove they paid the tax or else they'll get in more trouble for not only dealing but also not paying. Yes, a weird tax.

Abundance of what?

It's been less than a week since I resumed work after our winter break and I'm already working long hours. There's already a bunch of changes that are going on with work stuff and it's only the second week of January!!!

We're heading into the year of the pig, which symbolizes abundance. I am hoping for an abundance of wealth. I have a feeling this year will be about abundance of work.

Oh-seven, schveven

This is the obligatory holiday overview/new years resolution post.

I had a lot of holiday fun with family & friends. From Christmas with my crazy family (our annual family gift exchange included swapping TWO copies of the new Flower Drum S0ng DVD... yes, we are interesting) and minsoo's cousin's baby party, we had a good time full of crazy Yu/Kim/Lee/Wu family craziness. I also think I hosted my favorite new year's party ever. I got to see NU friends, especially our favorite third member of the loser's lair and had a really fun time with friends from LA.

My favorite parts of the holiday?
2 copies of the Flower Drum Song DVD at our family gift exchange... my weird family
Hanging with my sister Jess and my other sisters Hannah and Sarah [beh-tah Not]
Baby Eric Turns 1
Margaritas @ New Year's Eve made by small group peeps
Father's 0ffice Steak Salad & Sweet Potato Fries & Anchor Steam/Red Sail
Messing with the messy
Seeing friends from out of town like Summer & LoloSu
Sleeping in

My two-week holiday vacation was cut short on Wednesday morning when I got a call from my boss telling me that I was supposed to come into work. I thought our office was closed THROUGH Jan 3, when in fact, it was closed UNTIL Jan 3. Uh-oh. I spent my first whole day back moving furniture from the first floor to the second floor and rearranging our new office space, which kept me awake and away from actual work, but made my first day back seem very strenuous. I think I already need another vacation.

In terms of a new year's resolution, I kind of don't believe that resolutions work because every year I think of the same resolutions. In reality, each year is an opportunity to continue doing the good things you started last year, or try and stop the bad behaviors you started last year. Resolutions are always a continuation of last year's. In any case, my new year's resolution
is that it will be sucka-free. Whether that means I will not be a sucka or that I will not be around suckas is up for interpretation.

There. I am done. Ah, this post was boring. Maybe I should make a resolution to write interesting posts in 2007.

New Look

This new look was not meant to be significant or symbolic. My blog was missing its archives so I had to change my template to restore my archives. Stupid blogger "upgrade."

I might just change it back. This one is too serious.

I am embarassed as I post this, but I must
Yeeeaaahhhh, my fav on surv1vor won! I can now stop watching that show. I was wayyy too obsessed with it.

I'm sure all of the Korean mothers out there are drooling over Yu1. He was even in people's m0st beaut1ful pe0ple list. I wish I knew him so I could set him up with my single friends. I'm sure my single friends wish I knew him too.

on tv
It's been a busy month so I've been getting my tv fix by downloading or streaming my fav episodes off of the networks. I enjoy the usual serial dramas like L0st, Her0es, etc. but I'm also a total sucker for the following shows:

The B1ggest L0ser: The premise of the show seems so exploitative -- fat people go to fat camp and get kicked off the show for not losing enough weight -- but is actually one of the most inspirational show out there. I'm so happy that they decided to go with the whole "changing lives by saving lives" thing instead of the "let's make fun of fat people trying to get thin" thing. I just finished the season finale and the dude who won lost like 200+ pounds (he was over 400 lbs). He has toddler-aged daughters and his goal was to walk them down the aisle. *sniff sniff* Also a bonus: how superhot the guys look after losing all the weight. It still weirds me out how much I like this show.

Ugly Betty: It's like my new Sex&theCity guilty pleasure. I L0ve Betty -- it's so cheesy and cute and girlie. It's the show that helps balance out all of the serious series dramas that leave me with more questions than answers. So far, my favorite new show of the season -- even though I know it's not as good as all of those other shows. Amer1ca Ferrer0 is awesome.

Friggin Surv1v0r: When I first started watching this show, I promised myself that I would stop watching the show when all of the Asians were kicked off. It's been months and I'm still watching because those friggin Asians are rocking the game... especially my favorite player -- yu1, the korean-am guy who is rockin the show with his smarts, athleticism and good strategy. I can't believe how obsessed I am with finding out if yu1 wins. The finale is on Sunday and I'm actually WORRIED about yu1's chances of winning because people think he is overplaying (and I know this because I've been watching the extra content on the show's website). How sad am I? I promise, after this season, I will never ever watch this show again. Girl Scouts honor.

That's my tv update.

lame deal
Minsoo is at some fancy dinner hobnobbing with Asian actors and I'm here at home, working on a draft presentation for work and trying to tune out "deal or schmo deal" on tv while I wait for Here0s.

I really don't understand the appeal of the show. I mean, half the time they're just standing around talking, clapping, and doing weird things -- in this episode the guy is showing off his lasso-ing skills and a woman is showing off her obnoxious canned horn. They do a lot of jumping and screaming and then occassionally stop talking to open up a briefcase. And it seems like it's supposed to be suspenseful, but for the life of me, I can't figure out what is entertaining about this show. I also can't believe that nbc has devised such a lame ass game into a money maker.

I'd rather watch Minsoo and Ooj compete for the "Hand-in-cooler-full-of-ice-until-it-hurts" Championship. Yeah, I said it.

bitch fight?
So apparently, there's some dude out in the internets making some claims surrounding minsoo's sexual orientation due to his website persona. It's pretty freaking hilarious. Anyway, here's a discussion between me and hannah on what to do about this little ahem, problem...

SIL: i think it's hilarious someone thinks my brother is gay
SIL: LOL
Wai-Ling: i wanna meet that guy
SIL: kick his ass jo
Wai-Ling: i'll be like, hey sweetie... BACK OFF!
SIL: hhahha
Wai-Ling: then we'll get in a bitch fight
SIL: wor
SIL: d
SIL: the don't call you spunky jo jo for nothing
Wai-Ling: you'd have my back right?
Wai-Ling: heeeeyyyy
SIL: i got your back. i'll cut him.
Wai-Ling: with the shank you carry in your laptop bag?
SIL: hell yeah
Wai-Ling: i like that i have a bad-ass sister in law
SIL: i think when you meet me, the first thing you think is-- she's a bad ass
Wai-Ling: or at least one that talks a good game
Wai-Ling: i know, you do come off as a badass. it just emanates from you
SIL: fake it till you make it

behind the chicken

A soured Father-Son Parnership, murder and gyros...For those of you in LA who love chicken with garlic butter (aka garlic-flavored crisco), here's a story about the family behond our beloved Zankou. I drove by the site of the new westside location everyday on my way to school, waiting for it to open. After reading this story, I will never look at my tarna chicken plate the same.

Metropolitan News-Enterprise
Monday, November 20, 2006
Page 1

‘Zankou Chicken’ Trademark Remained With Founders Of Restaurant, Not Their Son—Court of Appeal

By TINA BAY, Staff Writer

The dissolution of a father-son partnership so that the son could expand the family business did not result in the transfer of exclusive business or trademark rights to the son, this district’s Court of Appeal ruled Friday.

Affirming an order by Los Angeles Superior Court Judge John Shepard Wiley Jr.,

Div. Eight concluded that rights to the trademark “Zankou Chicken” were validly assigned by one of the restaurant’s founders to her three adult children.

Markrid Iskenderian and her husband Vartkes, both deceased, opened a chicken restaurant decades ago in Beirut, Lebanon called Zankou Chicken. After immigrating to the United States in the 1980s, the Iskenderian family—the couple and their three children, Mardiros, Dzovig, and Haygan Iskenderian—opened the first stateside Zankou Chicken in Hollywood.

Though no written partnership agreement existed, the business filed taxes as a father-son partnership with a 60 percent interest held by the father and 40 percent by son Mardiros Iskendarian.

Markrid Iskenderian, who created Zankou Chicken’s signature garlic sauce, worked in the Hollywood restaurant with her husband and son. The partnership registered the Zankou Chicken trademark with the state in 1984.

In late 1991, a disagreement between parents and son regarding expansion of the business led to the dissolution of the partnership, with father paying son $40,000 for his partnership share. The parents, who did not want to open stores in other locations, continued operating the flagship store while allowing their son to open additional restaurants of his own.

He eventually opened Zankou Chicken restaurants in Glendale, Van Nuys, Anaheim and Pasadena, retaining all the profits from the additional locations while his parents kept the profits from the Hollywood store.

After Vartkes Iskenderian’s death in 1992, Markrid Iskenderian continued operating the Hollywood restaurant, and created a living trust conveying her sole ownership interest in the store to the trustee for the benefit of her two daughters. Though she once amended the trust to include her son as a beneficiary, she ultimately designated the trust only for her daughters’ benefit.

Since he had reaped the benefit of his parents’ fortune and had four stores of his own, she told her son in a letter, she was designating the flagship store for his sisters.

Without her knowledge, her son in 1992 registered the Zankou Chicken service mark in the United States Patent and Trademark Office, declaring in the application that he owned the mark and no other person had the right to use it. The registration was canceled in 2000 after Markrid Iskenderian discovered the action.

In 2002, Markrid Iskenderian created a second trust in which the trustees of the first trust assigned to the 2002 instrument’s trustees “all of her right, title and interest in the restaurant business, the trade name, service mark, or trademark commonly known as ZANKOU CHICKEN.” The trust provided for distribution of the trademark rights to her three children in equal shares, and of the Hollywood restaurant to her daughters.

In January 2003, Mardiros Iskenderian, who had been diagnosed with cancer two years earlier, shot and killed his mother, his sister Dzovig Iskendarian, and himself.

Eight months later, his widow, Rita Iskenderian, filed a petition in probate court asserting that she exclusively owned the Zankou Chicken Mark. She sought an order declaring the mark was not property of the 2002 trust and directing the trustee to execute a quitclaim of the mark to her. Haygan Iskenderian and Dzovig Iskenderian’s surviving sons and successors in interest agreed that she owned the mark, she alleged.

At a bench trial, she testified that after the partnership’s dissolution, her husband told her he “gave away” the Hollywood restaurant to his parents in return for the Zankou Chicken trademark.

Wiley declined to believe her, saying there was “no sensible reason” why parents who devoted their lives to building a business would forfeit all of their rights to the trademark embodying their lifelong work.

The judge found that the 1991 dissolution merely marked a realignment of the family members’ duties and the start of a “generally unified and cooperative family enterprise” that operated for decades until the 2003 tragedy. The Zankou Chicken mark was owned by the family enterprise on the day Markrid Iskenderian was killed, Wiley ruled, and she had validly transferred her interest in the mark to the 2002 trust.

The judge ordered that the trademark rights be equally distributed among Markrid Iskenderian’s three children, effectuating the trust.

Writing for the Court of Appeal, Justice Paul Boland agreed with Wiley:

“[T]he court expressly found, as a matter of fact, that the mark was not transferred to Mardiros when the partnership was dissolved. Therefore, ownership of the mark either remained with the family enterprise (as the trial court described it) or with Vartkes alone (as the partner who retained the mark). In either case, on Vartkes’s death, Markrid succeeded to his rights (and necessarily had community property rights of her own) in the mark, and had the authority to transfer those rights to the trust.”

Boland also rejected Rita Iskenderian’s argument that joint ownership of the mark was unlawful.

“To be sure, the joint ownership of a trademark can raise difficult problems when joint owners refuse to cooperate,” the justice wrote. “However, no evidence indicates Rita and the other family members with interest in the Zankou Chicken mark will be unable to agree on terms for the continuation of the family enterprise, or for a buyout of interests in the enterprise should they decide not to cooperate as they have in the past.”

Presiding Justice Candace Cooper and Justice Madeleine Flier concurred in the opinion.

Peter B. Gelblum, Douglas Bordewieck and Valentine Shalamitski of Mitchell, Silberbert & Knupp represented the plaintiff on appeal. Tulane M. Peterson and Gary W. Morris of Hart, Mieras & Morris represented the defendants.

The case is Iskenderian v. Iskenderian, 06 S.O.S. 5576.

awkward dinner
On wednesday I attended a swanky dinner for a certain LA-based non-profit that begins with APA and ends with LC at the Beverly Hilton. I was invited because my non-profit was given a grant by an organization who bought a table at the dinner.

Ack, and it was awkward...

6:20pm -- my attempt at arriving post-reception/silent auction was foiled by good traffic. I am pissed that I have to pay $10 to self-park my car.

6:40pm -- Spend 20 minutes wandering around the crowd looking for a familiar asian face. No such luck, even though I'm at a freakin' asian event. I guess I don't know enough rich Asian lawyers in LA. After wandering around I find a marble pilar to stand behind and call minsoo and my sister to pass the time and avoid the awkward standing alone and staring at strangers pose. I realize cell phones were made not just for convenience but also to avoid socially awkward situations.

6:55 -- I decide to go to my assigned table. Find it empty so I go to the bar to buy an $8.75 glass of wine to pass the time. I thought I'd get a free dinner, but I've already spent almost $20 just waiting to eat.

6:57 -- Run into the husband of an NU alum that I know from church. Yes! A familiar face. The guy isn't a lawyer and doesn't know anyone either. We spend a few minutes exchanging "I didn't know this event was going to be like this" and then go to our respective tables.

7:00pm -- Find people at my table; I sit with a nice woman who's in charge of the grants. She seems to know everyone and everyone else at the table knows other people. I'm the only one who doesn't know a soul. I stare intently at my program to avoid the awkwardness of knowing zero people.

7:15 -- The program starts and the M.C. turns out to be cute local sportscaster that I've had a crush on since high school. Maybe this event isn't so bad. Too bad the room is huge and I'm sitting in the nose bleed table, only able to see the guy from the large screens. I also spot another cute Asian news reporter. Watch cheesy but compelling videos about the non-profit's work. Is it weird to have a crush on an organization?

8:20pm -- The woman at my table introduces me to some Asian Judges. They ask me if I'm in the legal profession. The conversation ends there. Almost as awkward as talking to no one.

8:55pm -- Hells yes. People are leaving so I take my chance and book it out of there before dessert and more awkward conversation.

*SIGH* I really thought it'd be an awesome event. I still have a crush on the organization.

a silent fraternity
Angela's daughter came to work today to begin her internship with us. I really enjoyed catching up with her -- we talked about a bunch of random stuff -- her classes, our separate H&M trips, her mom's fashion, their old apartment, how we both hate abercrombie but for very different reasons... It was really nice to hang out with her. After she left, I started to feel really sad. It's been less than a month since A's passed away and even though work is getting back to normal and things are returning back to normal, I still feel that deep sense of loss constantly.

I was driving home today and there was a story on All Things Considered on NPR about a writer and her desire to document her father's final days. It was a beautiful story and my eyes were watering as I listened to her. During the story she said something that was so profound and applied so well to the way I was feeling today after seeing my friend's daughter.

"Grief scares people and my pain was so raw I think it was difficult for some of my friends to tolerate. I connected best to others who were wounded, many of them strangers. Serious loss brings you into one of the world's silent fraternities."

Today is election day.

Don't know where to vote?

Here you go...
http://www.smartvoter.org/

Don't know what issues you want to vote for?
www.aaa-fund.org has some good info... just a suggestion. Take it or leave it.

Not voting is for suckas. Please get your lazy ass out there and vote for goodness sake. I could go on but I won't.

I'm working helping to get out the vote today until the polls close at 8pm. VOTE please! There, now I'm done.

some cheering up
October flew by in a whirlwind of confusion and sadness. I'm still getting my bearings and still trying to deal with life in general. Fortunately, I was able to accompany minsoo to Hawaii for a short, much-needed weekend getaway. We went to Honolulu for the film festival and I got to see my relatives, including my cute little new second cousin. While I don't think the vacation was long enough, nor thorough enough to really help me begin to heal, there were some cool higlights. Here are some pics:
Pretty beaches...

Shrimp Truck on the side of the road... So yummy.


Butter and Garlic shrimp -- so good, the stray cats sat under Minsoo's legs just waiting for the scraps.


My cousin's baby, Kyle (a girl)... she's so cute, with her big head and fuzzy hair!


She was highly amused by me and my funny faces.

f****** insane day
My co-worker Angela is the one who convinced me to take a full time job at the South LA non-profit. She tried to bribe me with drinks at a boring conference and promised me "fun" research projects. What really convinced me to take the job was that she promised she'd be there. I really enjoyed our comraderie and how much fun we had while talking about everything from green building standards to the latest celebrity gossip. She always talked about quitting and so I made a deal with her that I'd stay on if she agreed to stay on with me. On Wednesday, when I dropped her off at the airport for a long weekend, we were talking about our next projects and I was totally motivated for an awesome year.

So when she didn't show up for work on Monday and today, my boss and I got worried. It wasn't like her not leave a voicemail telling me she'd be working from home or an email about our next research steps. The last time I got an email was on Saturday.

Today, I drove circles around the city with my boss, trying to track down her friends to find out what happened to her. By the end of the day, I learned the most horrific news:

On Saturday night, Angela returned from out of town to host a birthday party for a friend. She planned on spending the night at her friend's house and was last seen by one of her close friends at 4am on Sun morning, when she walked her friend to car after the party. Later that morning she went out for brunch with the birthday boy and a friend and when they got back, the friend (who had been doing drugs the previous night) apparently gave Angela a fatal dose of heroin via a shot in the neck. Just to clarify, Angela does not do drugs and, although there were some hard partying people at the party that night, she was fine when her friend left her at 4am. I doubt that Angela would have consented to doing drugs.

I heard this story while driving my boss and two of Angela's friends through the mid-Wilshire area. One of her friends, on the cell phone with Ang's mom as I was driving, was sobbing while the mom shared what she learned from the police report. Apparently, the woman who shot up was book on murder charges. Her friend relayed the message as we were driving up Hauser toward Wilshire in rush hour traffic and I almost had to pull over as everyone in my car was sobbing uncontrollably.

I know, I know. This S*** is F****** INSANE. There's no other way to describe it but to use profanity to describe this horrific story. But I kid you not, this is what I found out about my co-worker, my friend today. Her friends and I sat in horror and disbelief at this. On top of this, she has a wonderful 15 year old daughter who is amazing and who now thinks that everyone will remember her mom as a druggie -- which is NOT true.

I am sitting here right now, in disbelief that I am writing about this, but I need an outlet. Angela is a FRIEND, not just a co-worker, and I am struggling with her sudden and tragic and horrific death. My head hurts from holding the tears in, and from trying to wrap my head around the things I heard today. On top of everything, my boss and I don't want to tell our co-workers the lurid details of her death, so as to not ruin her reputation by focusing on her untimely death.

My boss and I spent all day wishing it was some really horrible mistake. I don't know how I'm going to get through my job without her and our lunchtime drinking sessions where she'd tell me all the dirt and help me figure out what the hell I'm supposed to be working on. I used to sit at my desk and think "What would Angela do?" when I couldn't figure things out. I can't believe that she's not going to be at her desk tomorrow. I seriously don't know how I'm going to do my job without my friend and partner in research crime. Her friend whom I met today, said to me, "Sweetie, she really liked you. She used to talk about how much she liked you."

Thanks for everything, Gigi. You are missed already.

oh you sillies
"I'm outside of a bar/club at Santana Row with Danny,Dean and Hannah and they're playing Push It. We thought of Jo."

-- Text message received by minsoo from ooj tonight.

why i love fall

PUMPKIN dessert!!!

However, this news does not bode well for the season's orange delight:

Fungus causes pumpkins to develop mold
Could affect this year's crop of Halloween jack-o-lanterns

Updated: 4:02 a.m. PT Oct 5, 2006
LAFAYETTE, Ind. - Halloween lovers hoping to create the perfect jack-o-lantern might want to shop carefully this year because of a pumpkin fungus that has put a dent in some crops.

Two types of fungus or rot have affected crops from the Midwest to New England, causing pumpkins to develop mold in some spots and then begin decomposing, said Daniel Egel, a Purdue University Extension plant pathologist. The entire inside of the pumpkin eventually rots until the shell falls apart.

A combination of high temperatures and record rain in August has helped the fungi flourish, Egel said.

anne shirley is my homegirl
Selections from my tape collection...

a favor
VOTE FOR JANE!!!

I'm ripping this off from my sis in laws' websites, but wanted to put in a plug for a friend -- many of you might remember her as one of the ladies that sang at our wedding... She's one of minsoo's oldest friends and has become a true friend of mine as well. Not only is she a kick-ass singer, but a great human being in general so PLEASE take a few and vote for her!! I don't know anything about that "wicked" musical, but I know a good thing when I see it and Jane is one of those good things. Voting for her is like voting for good things in this world. :)

Jane is one of 30 finalists for this singing contest sponsored by the musical "Wicked." You can watch her singing online, and then vote for her... if she wins, she'll get a free trip to New York and tickets to the show and a chance to sing live. So VOTE for her PLEASE!!!! And get all your friends to vote.

Here's what you have to do: Go to www.wicked-week.com
- Click on the "Wicked Week First Round 'Be Wicked' Singing Contest" link
- Click on the "Wicked Fan" area to register (yeah, its a pain, but it's just one step so please please please do it anyway)
- Once you're in, click on the East Coast link in the Round One Online Voting area.
- Listen to Jane (from Massachusetts, 26) sing! And then vote for her!!

** Random Fact: the background of her audition tape is Minsoo & Jane's home church!

Feed the need
Thanks to all who sent bday messages awhile back... I'm sorry I haven't responded -- it's been a bit crazy.

My kick ass sisters in law sent me the best birthday gift -- Anne 0f Green_Gables -- the original AND the sequel. YEEEEAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! Watching it on DVD sure beats downloading each 10 minute clip via Y0uTube. I've already watched an hour between watching season premieres of new shows.

Real life pales in comparison to Anne and her turn-of-the-century hijinks. Ha ha ha... I'm so sad.

Yesterday was one crazy day.
After a long plane ride home from St. Louis, my co-worker and I had to head up to fancy-pants Bel-Air to attend an event for our latest campaign. Our boss called us just as we were about to leave for the airport and told us that we needed to be there to help represent (I think she meant, help represent for all the ugly, poor, non-white people). Minsoo picked us up from the airport and we headed back to my place to transform ourselves from schlepy non-profit research nerds, to "hollywood casual" (whatever that means).

When we were driving to the house, we noticed the homes in the area got larger and larger and farther and farther from the street. Pretty soon we couldn't see the properties because of the tall gates and foliage surrounding the mansions. When we got to the house, there was only valet parking for my dust and pigeon-poo covered civic. Hollywood elites, here I come!

As I greeted people at the sign in table, I realized I had NO idea who owned the home. It turns out that the homeowner was the producer of Al G0re's movie and all of Tarentin0's movies -- CRAZY!!! I had no idea what the guy looked like, but when I walked into the house, the first photo I saw was the producer, who was with Bill and Hillary (Clinton). Um, yeah.

There were a bunch of hollywood producers and other entertainment people, but the only person I recognized was a gal from Melr0se Place.

Anyway, in one day I went from hangout in a cheesy ballroom in the midwest falling asleep to the sounds of obnoxious policy-makers to hanging out with well-groomed hollywood types in a mansion in Bel-Air. Surreal.

Today, after sleeping for 9 hours, I woke up and felt like a train hit me.

smell you later, policy weirdos
I'm about ready to check out of the hotel. Yay for free wireless in my room -- boo for the suckiness of downtown St. Louis.

I'm so excited to be out of here that I want to run laps around the ice cold partioned ballroom with the tacky red chairs & flower patterned rug and high-5 all of the bald heads of the middle aged white men at the conference while screaming, "I'm out SUCKASSSSSSSS!!!!! Take your boring policy-speak and annoying nasal voices and obnoxious 'tude and go back to D.C. or wherever the hell they keep boring policy wonks! Um, and by the way, YOU'RE UGLY!"

Needless to say, apparently policy wonks are not my type of nerd.

I need to get back to LA. Peace Out Midwest. The arch was only OK.

wow, i am so cool
Live from Nerd Fest 2006...

If I had to be here any longer, I might actually convince myself that I'm really cool...

Just spent sometime at the happenin' hotel bar, where my co-worker and I just got free drinks and food, courtesy of some dude who showed up after food service had closed. We gave him a half of our sandwich and he bought us our food and drinks in exchange for the sandwich and some "stimulating" conversation. He told us that he'd be happy to go to work if he'd see us everyday. EW. Thanks for the free booze dude, but you're 36 and you look like you're 46. GROSS. Also, I noticed that the ring finger on your left hand has big fat tan. EW. I guess I just experienced my first skeezy pick up at an out-of-town conference. Sad.

I'm leaving tomorrow. Yay. These humorless policy nerds are driving me crazy.

please tell me i'm cooler than this.
I am at nerd conference 2006.... aka the econ. analysis and research network conf in st. louis,mo. The opening plenary included jokes about tax reform and about how policy related to King Frederick of Prussia and his speech on how beer should not be replaced by coffee. I know, true nerd-fest.

You know you're at a nerdfest when...

You feel like the coolest person there.
Being drunk doesn't not make it better.
There is a woman with terrible dandruff and a man with terrible breath talking to you at the same time.

On the plus side, there's free internet and I can see the arch from my room.
Aw, how sad... and how nerdy.

Yes, a rockin' time in St. Louis.

I wanna go home.

social ambush
Earlier today, minsoo asked me if I wanted to "go see a free screening" of Co1ma:the musical (yes, a musical about the place with all the cemetaries and car dealerships on the way to SF. Funny funny). I was really tired from a long day at work, but I had wanted to see this film awhile ago, so I changed into grubby clothes, my comfy sweater and we headed to the theater in Little Tokyo. I figured it'd be a good way to veg out after a long day at work.

However, when we arrived, I was very surprised to find a semi-fancy reception gala going on outside the theater. I saw the business casual-dressed crowd sipping wine from clear cups and immediately felt under-dressed and unprepared for what I like to call "the schmooze". I wanted to just hop inside the theater, but we were forced to crash the party, not intentionally, but because the gala was blocking the entrance to the theater. We were socially ambushed.

We were spotted by a few acquaintances who directed us to the name tag and buffet table. I felt really underdressed and all-around uncomfortable and dying to escape into the theater. Note to self: in LA, going to see a movie may also require wearing heels and something trendy.

We also ended up in a few group photos. The photographer showed me the first photo, where I look so frumpy (Think Wai-Ling circa 1998). The second time the photographer asked if he could take a group shot of "Us" (aka people we were standing next to), I wanted to say no, but that would have been rude. So I tried to smooth out the lumps of food in my mouth and do a pressed-lip smile (never a good look for a "round" faced girl like me). Mmm, so beautiful.

When we first arrived, we met up with the guy who was going to get us free tickets and he introduced us (or rather, he introduced Minsoo) to a random girl who did PR for film festivals. She was young -- like, just out of undergrad young. And very enthusiastic, which made me feel even more awkward given that I was unprepared for social interaction. Under better conditions, I think we might have hit it off. However given my state, I just wanted her to stop talking. She went away after a bit, but then popped up as we were getting food and introduced us to her friend. I think she thought we were her age or not that much older because when minsoo introduced me to her friend as "my wife", she was taken aback, I hope because of how "young" we look/seem not because she was disappointed that minsoo was taken.

Pet peeve: standing right by a person being introduced by another person (who knows you) and not being introduced to that person. What the hell? How rude.

=sum(number 1, [number2],...)

5: Hot dogs consumed on Labor Day weekend
2: Part-time jobs
0: Full-time jobs
1: Lock picked this weekend (using a vons card and a paper clip)
3: Ants at work that crawled across my desk/computer/bag
4: Trips down to the 'rents house to play with my sister's cat
2: AnneofGG marathons this weekend
3: Margaritas mixed and enjoyed courtesy of my sister
3: Hours spent tonight working job #2 after working all day at job #1
5: Days until I go to a conference for job #1 & experience St. Louis...*YAWN*
-----
28.

no turning back now
Minsoo and I decided to merge our CD collections and sell off our duplicates for some extra cash. I used this opportunity to cleanse myself of my past music sins.

Among the exorcised late 90s-era CDs:
- The Titanic Soundtrack
- Savage Garden
- Can't Hardly Wait soundtrack... I had 3 copies of this one
- The Bodyguard Soundtrack
- All for One
- Backstreet Boys

I'll stop there. Suffice it to say, I had forgotten about my horrible CD collection so I was pretty shocked at the crap I collected over the years. It was minsoo's job to sell back the CDs, which must have been embarrassing for him.

I think it was a big deal to merge CD collections. I had to say good bye to some good CDs because Minsoo already had a copy and it made me think about the process of giving up part of your individual life for a partnership as a married couple -- something that was a huge deal for me during my engagement year. I guess becoming "one" is a long process.

I'm on AoGG crack
I just finished watching AnneofGreenGables: The Sequel on Y0utube. The entire movie was uploaded onto the site as 23, 3-10 minute clips. Yeah! Watching both of the movies on Y0utube was like being on crack... I'd finish watching a 10-min segment and then immediately load the next clip. I had to have it. I watched half of the sequel yesterday and only watched a few today before I had to go down to my parents' house to do some cleaning. I thought I'd have a chance to watch some more at their house, but I was totally busy. The entire time, I was thinking to myself: I can't wait to be done, I need to watch the "diamond sunbursts and marble halls" part. I raced home and immediately finished the movie. *sigh* I think if I saw the actor who plays Gilbert Blythe right now I'd pass out. This movie is like a drug. I'm basically now on an AoGG high.

Wow this post is really disturbing/scary/pathetic. I'll be back to talking about real issues and my daily mishaps soon.

wai-ling's definition of awesomesad
SCORE! I found the ENTIRE Anne of Green Gables movie on Y0utube last night... Someone had uploaded 10 minute portions of the movie so I watched 16 of 20 clips last night and just finished it. I haven't seen it in years and forgot how much I love it. I heart Gilbert Blythe!

On another A.o.G.G. note... there are some weird-ass fan videos out there. Apparently it's pretty popular to take clips of the movie and create (ahem) interpretive music videos... Among the songs used for the videos --

- You're Beautiful: James Blunt sings over clips of Gilbert gazing at Anne and each share longing looks
- Miss Independent: Kelly Clarkson belts it out as Anne maddogs Gilbert
- Lovefool: The Cardigan's girly song plays as Gilbert stalks Anne. This one makes him seem really creepy.

There are others, such as Eternal Flame (not the Bangles version, some other crappier version) and Hungry Eyes. Oh... my... goodness. I laughed so hard I almost peed. It just seemed so wrong. There's only one real song that goes with that movie -- All you fans know what I'm talking about.

Anne of GG fans, check it out... disturbing yet hilarious. And I guess sort of sad. I want to create my own definition of "AwesomeSad", messy and minsoo's term, to include this.

My reunion: One big, ugly cliche
Top 10 reasons why my reunion was not awesome:

10. Seeing one of the prettiest girls in high school, 50 pounds heavier. While it could have been one of those moments of sweet justice, I actually felt sort of sad for her and I could tell how uncomfortable she looked. Her awkwardness actually made it so uncomfortable that I didn't even talk to her.

9. None of the people I really missed from high school were there because those were the people least likely to go to a school event. The only other people I actually wanted to hang out with were people that went to my wedding and had seen within the past 6 months.

8. I realized 10 minutes into the reunion that I really didn't have any desire to talk to most of the people there.

7. I paid $170 (for 2) and THERE WAS NO OPEN BAR. I want my money back.

6. I ate half of my meal and then it was taken away from me by the aggressive waitstaff.

5. Explaining to people what I did and then getting blank stares. I should have made up my occupation, like actress/professional mover. Or maybe I could have said petite model/ninja.

4. Seeing a girl that I'd known since I was 4 who had gained 100 pounds and looked like she was into goth-slash-ren-faire stuff. When she came up to hug me (which was kinda intense), she pulled her cell phone out of her cleavage to show me a picture of her 6 month old daughter. Scaaaary.

3. Karaoke after dinner. Enough said.

2. It was one of those events that looked classy... from far away. Close up, the cheesy hotel ballroom, red/white ("sprited") carnation centerpieces, overweight drunk white guys who still party like they're 18 and the dirty-dancing big-chested girls who now strip for a living just made me feel like the whole evening was one skanky ass wedding gone awry.

1. No open bar.

Am I glad I went? Hm, ask me in 10 years.

my keyboard is burning my fingers
My boss and co-worker are out of the office today so I've taken the opportunity to waste as much time as possible while still doing enough work not to get caught slacking off. My other co-worker does as much work in a day as I've done in the past hour slacking off so I think I can pull a "case of the Mondays."

I haven't blogged in awhile about anything substantial so I guess this a preview of things to come:

- Reunion. Yes I went. Was it worth it? Only because the new 3.5/4 inch heels I bought for the occasion are my new favorite shoes.

- The Mayor. I got to see him at a launch for our new campaign for "green" jobs for LA's working class. He looked as slick as ever.

- Baby. No not us, silly fools. My cousin just had a baby. Her name is Kyle, which does a number on my gender identification skills, especially since the baby is very androgenous looking, as all babies are. The nurses put a green cap on her head because they couldn't figure out what gender she was. Ha ha! They live in Hawaii so I can't wait to visit them in Feb when our other cousin gets married.

- Jobs. Still waiting to see which one can give me the best deal. For now, still working at two part time, still trying to make ends meet.

Will post more... now back to sitting under a hot skylight in a black shirt, trying not to sweat on the keyboard and pretending to work.

why, West LA, why?
My neighborhood is going to the dogs. From 7-9 tonight, my local BestBuy is hosting a she-who-shall-not-be-named in-store appearance. (That was for you, messy.) I feel a bit betrayed by my local BB for hosting such an event. Just knowing that she'll be in my zip code makes me feel a bit skeezy.

full disclosure
I've been getting a lot of flak for being so stressed out about my reunion. However, in my defense, let me show you why I am so concerned:

Hey little boy, why are you wearing lipstick?
Winter, 1995. I got the worst haircut of my life right before my senior winter formal, ironically the same venue that tonight's reunion will be held.

Now, do you get it?

10 years later...
So I've decided that I'm probably going to the reunion (Thanks to the 3 people who filled out my survey). I went shopping for an outfit and ended up shopping at the mall near my parents house. As I was wandering the mall, I realized that I was shopping at the same stores I would have gone to as a high schooler shopping for a high school dance -- Macy's, Robinsons-May, Charlotte Russe, Forever 21, Windsor Fashions. How apropos. However, while these places had a lot of dance-appropriate outfits none of these stores carried my future reunion outfit. It was weird walking through the mall, remembering myself 10 years ago, doing the same thing (actually it was over 10 years since I graduated June 96, but that's a minor point, I suppose), wondering what all the high school kids would think about my outfit. Now, here I was, walking the same mall, wondering the same thing.

On another note, I was talking to my co-workers about the reunion and comparing stories about high school and talking about 5-year college reunions, when the youngest co-worker (a dude who just finished undergrad) said: "Wait, you've been out of college over 5 years!!???" Yes, I'm older than you, sucka.