(over instant msgr)
Minsoo: David Beckham is coming to my office today.
Wai-Ling: what the what?
M: the Becks will be here. he will give a brief hello to everyone in attendance, then he'll field some questions.
W: dannnnggggg
M: I will be sure to take photooooos.
W: yes pleeeassssseeee. david beckham is a good looking man.
M: little by little, I will cross off all the names on my man-crush list. I've already met the D-Hen and 0bama. Becks is next. I've met Brad P1tt's missus, so that's close enough.
We will meet someday, Cl00ney.
W: ha ha haaaaaaa
8/09/2010
8/05/2010
a cathartic entry about finally leaving my job
After 5 years, I've finally done it. I've worked up the confidence to leave the most unhealthy relationship I've ever had -- the one I have with my current job.
Why is it unhealthy? (Quote are based on actual thoughts I've had about my job/things I've actually said)
I have no work/life boundaries: Coworkers email me at odd hours because they don't bother working until 1am. And after working a full day, I still come home and answer their emails at all hours. I have also found it normal to get text messages at 11pm asking if I'm still awake so they can talk to me for another few hours. I do not manage large sums of money or heal sick people so there really should be no reason for me to jump when they call.
My self-confidence has been shattered: I come home from work filled with stories about how my coworkers belittled my work. And then I get onto my computer and do more work that will be belittled the next day. But of course, if I said anything about feeling belittled, they would belittle me and tell me that I'm just being silly.
I still seek approval, even though I never get any: I hate that my coworkers sometimes look down on me, but I want their approval so that I can be considered as "down" as they are. "Yes, I'm leaving for another job, but that job is as cool as this job... What, you don't think so? Wait, wait, lemme prove it to you!"
I'm in denial & make excuses for them: I've thought about quitting so many times, but then I think to myself, "But, they need me! If I don't stay, then who will x,y & z? " and "They're only mean because they care so much about the work!"
I have become co-dependent: "If I stay, I can make it better!"
While I love, believe in and respect the work (in theory) and will never publicly diss them, working there has taken a toll on my mental health. When I step back, I am proud of my accomplishments and the ability to have learned and accomplished work in such an unhealthy atmosphere. My org is well respected and I am honored to be a part of its work.
Having said all of that, I'm getting the hell out of there, bruised and battered, but stronger and a little bit crazier for having endured all of that.
Why is it unhealthy? (Quote are based on actual thoughts I've had about my job/things I've actually said)
I have no work/life boundaries: Coworkers email me at odd hours because they don't bother working until 1am. And after working a full day, I still come home and answer their emails at all hours. I have also found it normal to get text messages at 11pm asking if I'm still awake so they can talk to me for another few hours. I do not manage large sums of money or heal sick people so there really should be no reason for me to jump when they call.
My self-confidence has been shattered: I come home from work filled with stories about how my coworkers belittled my work. And then I get onto my computer and do more work that will be belittled the next day. But of course, if I said anything about feeling belittled, they would belittle me and tell me that I'm just being silly.
I still seek approval, even though I never get any: I hate that my coworkers sometimes look down on me, but I want their approval so that I can be considered as "down" as they are. "Yes, I'm leaving for another job, but that job is as cool as this job... What, you don't think so? Wait, wait, lemme prove it to you!"
I'm in denial & make excuses for them: I've thought about quitting so many times, but then I think to myself, "But, they need me! If I don't stay, then who will x,y & z? " and "They're only mean because they care so much about the work!"
I have become co-dependent: "If I stay, I can make it better!"
While I love, believe in and respect the work (in theory) and will never publicly diss them, working there has taken a toll on my mental health. When I step back, I am proud of my accomplishments and the ability to have learned and accomplished work in such an unhealthy atmosphere. My org is well respected and I am honored to be a part of its work.
Having said all of that, I'm getting the hell out of there, bruised and battered, but stronger and a little bit crazier for having endured all of that.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
