Hannah, This is for you. 

'nuf said. 

My Grandmother, enjoying Chinese food in Milpitas. She's like 97. 

My Grandmother. At the GreatMall. Getting a Coloring Book. From Santa.  

heading toward dec
It's been a stressful few weeks. My professors have decided that a majority of the assignments should be due in November instead of in Dec, near finals. It's good because I'm done with most of my assignments in Nov, but this month has worked me good. To add to the stress, most of the assignments have included presentations and negotiation exercises where we have to defend our group projects. Speaking in public and trying to sound smart just increases my stress exponentially.

Anyway, I'm super friggin tired of group projects. I have one group project that is currently my own personal hell, probably because we were assigned these groups so I wasn't able to pick my gang of four. Since our professor failed to teach us anything, the only people who know what is going on are the people who have work experience in the topic and people who pretend they know everything. As a result, I'm experiencing the "weakest link" syndrome where people ignore me when I ask questions/make suggestions and set up meetings during times when they know I won't be in town (which makes me feel as if I'm not valuable to the group). It's a fun fun time in group land. I am definitely not comfortable with this position as I'm used to being "super group member" and not dead weight. I am already make mental notes to share on our course evaluations. I'm trying to think of comparable phrases to "This class sucks".

I just want to crawl into bed and recooperate.

One more week and then it'll be Dec... one more week and then it'll be Dec...

is it cold where you are?
Yesterday was Chicago's first snow day. It was also the 3rd or 4th day of 80+ degree weather and red flag fire danger warnings in LA. Ah, Global warming. I am no longer going to brag about our unseasonably good weather, because it has gotten so out of hand. One week it's rainy, the next week it's dry and hot. Pretty soon the tanning salons will be out of business. It doesn't seem natural (both the weather and the tanning salons). And frankly, the crazy weather we've had world-wide in the past few years is starting to really scare me.

I am glad for the sun, though, since my toe is stil not shoe-ready.

new tv guilty pleasure
My new guilty pleasure? The tvshow-Biggest_Loser. Yes, I know, it seems like such a messed up idea for a reality show: Overweight people stay at a big house while they lose weight by working out with insanely fit and intense trainers. Each week, they do a weigh-in and if the contestants loses less weight (body weight percentage) than the others, they can be "voted" off the ranch. Seems harsh, right?

However, the show is kind of heartwarming. I know, I know, sounds crazy. I mean, even the show title is so degrading. But hear me out. Many of the moments they show are of these people talking about how much they care about their families and how much self-confidence they are getting. There's surprisingly a lot of tear-jerking moments and crazy transformations. It's almost like watching thathome makeover show (you know what I mean). Anyway, I'm hooked and I can't stop watching. I think they need to bring out the next season ofScrubs, and quickly.

those ingenious little rice squares
On Saturday afternoon, I did some all-you-can-eat Korean barbecue at our favorite k-town make-your-clothes-stinky restaurant. We went with some people from northern california who were dduk bo sam virgins (all Koreans, by the way) so when the rice didn't show and we asked the waiter for the rice squares, our friends were taken aback. They were even more confused when the squares appeared on our table. One of my friends grabbed like 10 of the squares and took a few bites out of them, all at once. I had to explain to him the process of taking one thin sheet, dipping the beef in the salty/oily mixture and rolling the saucy meat in the dduk bo sam. Our friends were in awe of this new trend in Korean BBQ. After I explained the process minsoo said, "Dude, you just got schooled by a Chinese girl." Indeed.

That same weekend, I also gave my Asian classmates a "tour" of K-town, as if marrying a Korean granted me knowledge of all-that-is-Korean. Hm, maybe it did.

to be young, gifted...and asian
I'm beginning to think that I don't want to work at non-profits after graduation because I sort of feel like the current ones have already been co-opted by "the man." Most scramble around in their own communities, following the grant money that the government sprinkles at non-profits, trying to keep themselves afloat in the system, trying to gain polical influence and power, not really doing any real transformative work, but merely sustaining the underclass with just enough services to keep them barely afloat.

So essentially, I'd still be "selling out" by working for non-profits. And if I'm going to "sell out," I feel like I should at least make some serious cash, right? If I'm going to sell out, I gotta do it big, no? That way, when I start the revo-whatever-the-heck-it-is, I don't have to rely on the system.

I think I'm getting more radical because of school. I love school because I get to study tons of cool topics all the time with super cool people who are 10x more radical than me... my latest topics have ranged from providing service-enriched housing for emancipated foster care youth to discussing gentrification in asian am neighborhoods to the struggle for the rights of day laborers. My classmates and I talk about "revolution" all the time. I don't think I even know what it is, but one of my classmates seems to think that I should be the one to start it. I can't even speak up in class, what makes him think I can do something revolutionary?

Dang, and speaking of revolutionaries or lack thereof -- where the hell are Asian voters? Oh yeah, they don't vote. I saw a news report about the special election last week and they featured "apathetic voters" -- all of whom were Asian college kids from uc-la. I was so pissed. Once again there was the media portrayal of the of asian youth as civically disengaged and unaffected by critical social issues. Where are all the serious Asians? What is it going to take for Asians to realize that there is oppression going on toward our community? When are those rich apathetic comfortable Asians going to stand up and realize that our individual social standing does not exclude us from collective racism and that we need to be represented in the larger social change movement?

I think I'm going to create a gang and label them "young, gifted--and Asian", and NOT include smart asians who don't give a damn but include only asians who actually represent. I've already got my "gang of_four" at school. Who else is with me? Raise your fists.

Minsoo and I are kind of a sad pair.
On Sunday night, he cut his finger on a broken glass mug that fell into our sink. He has this fat bandage on his hand that I have to help him replace everyday.
- 1 digit (right ring finger)

On Monday I went to the podiatrist to get my toe fixed. Hopefully this is the last time. The podiatrist promised that my shoes would no longer sit lonely in my closet. He also promised that I'd be able to get into my JimmyChoos after this procedure. I am now committed to buying my first pair of JCs when my toe heals as a form of celebration.
- 1 digit (right big toe)

Today I got a call from Minsoo as I was going to school. He got rear ended by a car on the 10. The back bumper fell off and he had to grab it off the road and toss it into his trunk. Now he has a seriously sore back and possibly whiplash.
-1 neck/back movement.

= 3 body parts that are messed up.

We went grocery shopping today and it was sort of sad. I drove superslow because my toe was hurting and he couldn't drive. We meandered through the aisles because I couldn't walk fast and it took us longer than usually to empty our cart, load up the car and carry our groceries up the stairs. I felt like we were an old couple in our 80s doing errands.

specialelection -- kiss my ass.
Let's talking about Tuesday. Do you know what tuesday is? It's the day when most people say: "crap, I forgot." or "really, it was today???" or "didn't I just do it in may?" Yes, it's special electionday. I am pretty pissed that my taxes (and I paid a lot last year) are paying for this ridiculous attempt at "reform." Anyway, my personal theme for this election comes from possibly the most annoying commercial on tv right now -- that davidspade credit-card commercial.

If you don't know what to vote for, just vote no. Tell 'em the governor you hate that he's wasting money instead of actually working with the legislature to "reform" this state.

I haven't growled lately on this blog.
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.